Warning-Friday HUMOR-Viruses

From: Ross Gates (selecteng@novagate.com)
Date: Fri Nov 06 1998 - 15:38:27 EET


***** ATTENTION! NEW VIRUSES ******

MARTHA STEWART VIRUS -- Takes all your files, sorts them by category and
folds them into cute little doilies to be displayed on your desktop

X-FILES VIRUS -- All your Icons start shape shifting

SPICE GIRL VIRUS -- Has no real function, but makes a pretty desktop

AT&T VIRUS -- Every 3 minutes it tells you what great service you are
getting

MCI VIRUS -- Every 3 minutes it reminds you that you're paying too much
for the AT&T virus

ELLEN DEGENERES VIRUS -- Your IBM suddenly claims it's a MAC

MONICA LEWINSKY VIRUS -- Sucks all the memory out of your computer

TITANIC VIRUS -- Makes your whole computer go down

DISNEY VIRUS -- Everything in the computer goes Goofy

MIKE TYSON VIRUS -- Quits after one byte

PROZAC VIRUS -- Screws up your RAM but your processor doesn't care

SHARON STONE VIRUS -- Makes a huge initial impact, then you forget it's
there

LORENA BOBBIT VIRUS -- Turns your hard disk into a 3.5 inch floppy

TIM ALLEN VIRUS -- Appears helpful, only to destroy your hard drive upon
contact

WOODY ALLEN VIRUS -- Bypasses the motherboard and turns on a daughter
card

SADDAM HUSSEIN VIRUS -- Won't let you into any of your programs

TONYA HARDING VIRUS -- Turns your .BAT files into lethal weapons

GEORGE MICHAEL VIRUS -- Runs its course, occasionally releasing excess
data buildup

JOEY BUTTAFUOCO VIRUS -- Only attacks minor files

RONALD REAGAN VIRUS -- Saves your data, but forgets where it is stored

DR. JACK KEVORKEIN VIRUS -- Searches your hard drive for old files and
deletes them

SONY BONO VIRUS -- Just when you're surfing the web, a firewall appears
out of nowhere

OPRAH WINFREY VIRUS -- Your 200MB hard drive suddenly shrinks to 80MB,
and then slowly expands to 300MB

ARNOLD SCHWARZENEGGER VIRUS -- Terminates and stays resident but it'll
be back

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