FW: Technologically Challenged

From: Dark, Jeffrey T (Jeff.Dark@PSS.Boeing.com)
Date: Thu Mar 26 1998 - 19:51:39 EET

This is too good not to post, Mike! Maybe the average intelligence of
homo sapiens is dramatically lower than we RPers believe!

> Jeff Dark
> Tech Focal/Lead Engineer
> BCAG Rapid Prototyping Center
> Boeing Company M/S 17-PE
> ph: (206) 655-4366
> Fax: (206) 655-0934
> jeff.dark@PSS.boeing.com
> Technologically Challenged
> 1. Compaq is considering changing the command "Press Any Key" to
> "Press Return Key" because of the flood of calls asking where the
> "Any" key is.
> 2. AST technical support had a caller complaining that her mouse was
> hard to control with the dust cover on. The cover turned out to be
> the plastic bag the mouse was packaged in.
> 3. Another Compaq technician received a call from a man complaining
> that the system wouldn't read word processing files from his old (5
> 1/4)
> diskettes. After trouble-shooting for magnets and heat failed to
> diagnose the problem, it was found that the customer had labeled
> the diskettes, then rolled them into the typewriter to type the
> labels.
> 4. Another AST customer was asked to send a copy of her defective
> diskettes. A few days later a letter arrived from the customer along
> with photocopies of the floppies.
> 5. A Dell technician advised his customer to put his troubled floppy
> back in the drive and close the door. The customer asked the tech to
> hold on, and was heard putting the phone down, getting up and going
> across the room to close the door.
> 6. Another Dell customer called to say he couldn't get his computer
> to
> fax anything. After 40 minutes of trouble-shooting, the technician
> discovered the man was trying to fax a piece of paper by holding
> it in front of the monitor screen and hitting the "send" key.
> 7. Yet another Dell customer called to complain that his keyboard no
> longer worked. He had cleaned it by filling up his tub with soap and
> water and soaking the keyboard for a day, then removing all the keys
> and washing them individually.
> 8. A Dell technician received a call from a customer who was enraged
> because his computer had told him he was "bad and an invalid". The
> tech explained that the computer's "bad command" and "invalid"
> responses shouldn't be taken personally.
> 9. A confused caller to IBM was having troubles printing documents.
> He told the technician that the computer had said it "couldn't find
> printer". The user had even tried turning the computer screen to
> face
> the printer - but his computer still couldn't "see" the printer.
> 10. An exasperated caller to Dell Computer Tech Support couldn't get
> her new Dell Computer to turn on. After ensuring the computer was
> plugged in, the technician asked her what happened when she pushed
> the power button. Her response, "I pushed and pushed on this foot
> pedal
> and nothing happened." The "foot pedal" turned out to be the mouse!
> 11. Another customer called Compaq tech support to say her brand-new
> computer wouldn't work. She said she unpacked the unit, plugged it
> in
> and sat there for 20 minutes waiting for something to happen. When
> asked what happened when she pressed the power switch, she asked
> "What power switch?"
> 12.True story from a Novell NetWire SysOp:
> Caller: "Hello, is this Tech Support?"
> Tech: "Yes, it is. How may I help you?"
> Caller: "The cup holder on my PC is broken and I am
> within my warranty period. How do I go about
> getting that fixed?"
> Tech: "I'm sorry, but did you say a cup holder?"
> Caller: "Yes, it's attached to the front of my
> computer."
> Tech: "Please excuse me if I seem a bit stumped,
> it's because I am. Did you receive this as
> part of a promotion, at a trade show?
> How did you get this cup holder? Does it
> have any trademark on it?"
> Caller: "It came with my computer, I don't know
> anything about a promotion. It just has
> '4X' on it."
> At this point the Tech Rep had to mute the caller, because he
> couldn't stand it. He was laughing too hard. The caller had been
> using the load drawer of the CD-ROM drive as a cup holder, and
> snapped it off the drive.
> 13. Another IBM customer had troubles installing software and rang
> for support. "I put in the first disk, and that was OK. It said to
> put
> in the second disk, and I had some problems with the disk, but I
> squeezed it in. When it said to put in the third disk - I couldn't
> even fit it in..." The user hadn't realized that "Insert Disk 2"
> meant to remove Disk 1 first.

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