Off-topic - RE: Friday Funnies

From: Monica & Glenn Whiteside (
Date: Sat Apr 10 1999 - 04:34:13 EEST

One liners...

>-- How do crazy people go through the forest? They take the psycho path.
>What did the fish say when he hit a concrete wall? "Dam!" What do
>Eskimos get from sitting on the ice too long? Polaroids. What do
>prisoners use to call each other? Cell phones. What do you call a
>boomerang that doesn't work? A stick. What do you call cheese that isn't
>yours? Nacho Cheese. What do you call Santa's helpers? Subordinate
>Clauses. What do you call four bull fighters in quicksand? Quattro
>sinko. What do you get from a pampered cow? Spoiled milk. What do you
>get when you cross a snowman with a vampire? Frostbite. What has four
>legs, is big, green, fuzzy, and if it fell out of a tree it would kill
>you? A pool table. What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches? A
>nervous wreck. What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup?
>Anyone can roast beef. Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where
>you left him. Where do you get virgin wool from? Ugly sheep. Why are
>there so many Smiths in the phone book? They all have phones. Why do
>bagpipers walk when they play? They're trying to get away from the
>noise. Why do gorillas have big nostrils? Because they have big fingers
>What's the difference between an oral thermometer and a rectal
>thermometer? The taste. What is a zebra? 26 sizes larger than an "A"
>bra. Did you hear about the flasher that was thinking about retiring? He
>decided to stick it out for one more year. What do you get when you
>cross a pit bull with a collie? A dog that runs for help... after it
>tears your throat out. What does it mean when the flag is at half mast
>at the post office? They're hiring. What kind of coffee was served on
>the Titanic? Sanka.

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